A few months ago I started my first ever blawg—now-quasi-legendary Bad Pitch Blog—with a friend, Kevin Dugan of the Strategic PR blog. As you might have guessed, our goal is to stop bad correspondence and releases from hitting desks and inboxes of reporters (and especially voice mails, yikes!). There are so many billions of bad pitches out there that we said, ah the heck with it. Let’s stop being politic and take a look at what’s out there. Then let’s out guilty parties in full view of their peers.

Before long, we started to hear a new question: What is a good pitch, then? So here is small good pitch handbook. And yes they are in no order of importance. Gosh…they’re all important.

The bottom line to this dissertation is there are so many numerous bad pitches that have come across my desk since BadPitchBlog began that I don’t know where to start in answering the question on a lot of folks’ minds: How Do You Pitch?

Bottom line
The Hollywood image of the investigative reporter is bunk. Real reporters don’t hang around back alleys wearing trench coats, waiting for a meeting with an undercover source. Instead, they sit at desks, make calls seeking information and, mostly, wait for the phone to ring. If you can help provide the news they need, you’re likely to garner another clip for your collection. Your ability to place a story depends on understanding media and the Herculean task of putting out a regular news product. These people are inundated with pitches. How do you beat the odds and place your story successfully? Here in a certain order are our suggestions:

Shop locally
All the readers of every metropolitan or community newspaper share a common location or hometown. By tapping into that commonality, you will attract the media’s attention. Almost every national story has a local angle. Your job is to determine what it is and how it relates to your product. If crime rose nationally and you sell alarm systems in Hoboken, you have an obvious opportunity to attract media.

Connect to something huge
Your company or product might not be noteworthy by itself, but it’s probably a good example of a larger trend that the media cares about. Be topical. Look for stories the media is already running —disaster relief, crime, education, the economy—and determine how your product is relevant.

Go for Escapist News
While your idea may be duller than you’d hoped, it can still be hooked into an ongoing cultural event. Making news a “huge story” is not groundbreaking. Today’s news is in the wrapping and the hand-off. I always suggest taking a Hollywood approach to buzz. The large-scale pop angles are hardly an LA thing. I believe that all-out push toward TV and movies is something every story should strive for no matter how dull on paper. This is not merely done by Paramount and Pixar; it’s the wily world of aggressive PR on a corporate-attack scale. Remember if it seems like “it’s” not getting pickup you have to make “it” less about the facts and more of what people sorely want: fluffiness, just like the snow that just fell all over New York!

Just follow-up, and then after that follow-up
Don’t make promises you don’t or can’t keep. If you say in your letter, “I will call you,” then dammit, call. Why do people high-five when a reporter gets interested then drop the ball? I can’t stop shaking my head. Arg.

Shocking!
Don’t go overboard, but you can gain media attention if you position your service or product in an attention-getting, or even controversial, way. Think about it like this: You say something funny or unusual and you get press. Like for instance in the 90’s we repped a software company (ASP) that ran work products on the Web. People hated to think they had to download products so our company put out a version that was all hosted. Our CEO said “I hate software too.” That got a lot of attention.

Use celebrities like they so sorely want to be used
The media love them because readers love them. Your goal is always to attach your product to a celebrity. Send free samples to celebrities or sports figures (find their managers at www.whorepresents.com, one of my favorite URLs) to see if they’ll use the product. If they do, you have instant press. It’s amazing how the word “celebrity” is used today—these are people who are probably famous for one thing, but heck if it gets your product in….what do you care!

Like your 1st grade teacher said (only without the wagging finger): Don’t Lie
Just once you might get away with burning a reporter with an inaccuracy or exaggeration in a release. Don’t kid yourself. The word spreads quickly. You will have harmed your cause. For a long time. You’ll be that “manic PR guy or gal who always fibs.”

Analysts Are the Rage
I don’t know why so many PR people think analysts are just a drag/bother/reason to get all worked up. At analyst meetings, executives discuss their company’s strategy and finances with industry experts who then act as third-party advocates. A well-conducted meeting will leave analysts better able to discuss your business with the media, and so it will generate indirect buzz. Prepare a PowerPoint-type presentation for the analysts. Be sure your numbers will withstand extreme scrutiny. Practice carefully, and select analyst firms that are expert in your field. Follow up to make sure you answered all the analysts’ questions. And ooh boy how much fun: get an analyst’s comments into a release.

Source File like Life Depends on It
Send your clips to editors and position yourself or your source as an entertaining, interesting expert so reporters keep your number on hand and call on you. That letter should be short—three or four bullets. Take your time here especially if you want someone to hold that note. Keep in mind the Mark Twain cliché: If I had more time I’d have written less!

Tour, Baby
If you have an interesting story accompanied by unusual visuals, you may want to host a media tour of your plant. One time-tested method of appealing to media people is through their appetite, so order snacks, hors d’oeurves or a buffet. We like cheese.

And B
Get some footage that television stations can use in the background as colorful fodder. Well produced b-roll will demonstrate your product being used and will serve the media’s needs. Send the footage to interested producers before your event or release.

Beta, My Friend
Include journalists in your sneak peak testing of an upcoming product. You will create the potential for excellent reviews—if the product is really ready.

Event Madness
The media likes to cover something actually taking place but don’t invite people to something via release or correspondences that are total crap. You can host a launch or release party. If you want a creative event for a voice recognition product, for example, you could invite some top typists to compete against your automated product and ask members of the media to judge the winner. Count on the fact that only about five percent of those you invite will show up. If you want 40 people, send out 800 press invitations. Collect RSVPs and send out reminder notes, make follow up calls and last minute “we know you’re coming” calls. But whatever you don’t do, do not send letters saying “guess who will be there.” That’s just crass. And eye-roll-able.

Elitism with Capital E
Every media outlet likes to have something nobody else has. Exclusives are beloved! If there is one key market you want to attract—say The San Jose Mercury News for tech industry—offer it to them first. Generally, you don’t want to send a letter that proffers an exclusive to a magazine because it usually will have a two to three month delay before publication. You can give a related story to two non-competitive media outlets—such as USA Today and an industry newsletter. They expect you will.

Surveying the Populace
Providing data can be effective and relatively inexpensive. Start with an issue critical to your business, an area where you wish to focus attention due to your competitive strength. Broaden that concept to cover a societal issue: how people pass the time when they are on hold, what happens to the average person’s blood pressure when they have a consumer issue, where the average person turns with computer technical trouble. Shine the light where you want it, then contact the media and make sure they have a chance to tell their audience about your important “discovery.”

Never Pitch Wolf
Don’t get the media oh my G-d excited over smoke and then fail to deliver the fire. A public relations person who cries wolf with a couple of off-the-mark pitches is soon crossed off everybody’s list. Getting the media to respond when you offer an idea is all about building your own credibility. Don’t blow it. Fool me once, the saying goes.

Finally
Remember to make people feel good. I know your Mom told you that once and it’s still true. The best pitch is the one people go hey that’s cool. If you can’t do that you need to reconsider your job. Or if you won’t do that then at least reconsider the topic, angle, client, spokesperson, or overall theme. If it’s boring you to a tear imagine what it’s doing to the recipient.

This is meant to be a dialogue. What do you think the best pitching is?

Write me at richard@RLMpr.com. Let’s make our industry more intrigued and less yelled at. The former is fun.

The author, Richard Laermer, is RLM’s CEO & President. He is ridding the world of bad PR, one pitch at a time. He’s host of new radio show Unspun (www.fourthsense.com).